Wild Card

13th May 2015

IMG_8500 - Version 3There’s been some not so nice comments floating around out there about my body…IMG_8663

So today I’m fighting back with this dress and sharing a few really important messages about embracing your body type and overcoming all that negativity!

Okay, this post is very uncensored (well, aren’t I always? but you know what i mean). No, you won’t find any curse words or anything like that in here (I don’t use much of those, I’m not quite cool enough) but you will find some really raw and unedited opinions (and un-retouched photos, yikes), so brace yourself!IMG_8559

Remember how I told you I was determined to showcase a different side of my style this year with outfits that might surprize you and not in the normal “omg she’s wearing 47 colors and 32 prints” sort of way? Well today is another one of those days were I step so far outside of my comfort zone, make good on that promise and channel my inner Kardashian in this body-con figure-flaunting look, where’s that dang eye-covering monkey emoji… I really need that little guy right about now.IMG_8535

So back to those not so nice comments... Maybe I’m over reacting (yeah, probably) they’re nothing too bad, just things like “that’s really unflattering” or “uhhh she doesn’t have the right body type for this look” and they never come from anyone I know… It’s not like I even care… lol okay I try not to, but of course I care a little, but either way I can’t just ignore them, that’s so not the Courtney Way, but I can help you conquer something similar if you ever find yourself in a comparable situation.IMG_8672

Having a blog is this weird thing – you share your style with strangers and put yourself out there everyday. 99% of the time the feedback is amazing or constructive and is what helps you power through those long nights or time when you really don’t want to smile for a photo (I’m drafting this post at 2:16 AM and pulling my second all nighter of the week [yep.. It’s only Tuesday] … so I’m using all the fuel I can get right now, SO THANKS!).

As a result, the negative ones shouldn’t ever bother you, you shouldn’t take it personally or even dwell on them… but that it’s not always that easy. Another weird thing that happens is you become this “not real person” to people out there, so they say things objectively without thinking about how they would affect people – I’m even guilty of it, I make assumptions about celebrities I know nothing about like “omg Kristin Stewart is so annoying….” which I totally believe with every fiber of my being even thought I couldn’t tell you one real thing about her, besides she makes idiotic decisions like choosing sparkling vampires over super cute werwolves that will love you forever no matter what, or wait, is that just Bella? Either way, these comments that we all make aren’t really targeted at you, or me or Kstew on a personal level, but we (well at least I) totally took them that way – hence why I hear the “she’s too short for that outfit” comment as “Oh My God Becky that Courtney Girl is is a hawt mess, we should totally go TP her house or toss a slushy in her face” in my head… makes sense, right? wrong but it’s the truth, oh and If you didn’t gather, I watch a lot of TV.IMG_8602

No matter what I think of the comments they are out there …
they happened, they exist so I figured I had 3 options (the same three options you have when anyone says anything awful about you like ever, FYI these also totally apply to a break up!)
OPTION 1 – The Drake
Cry in the shower, binge watch gossip girl and eat your weight in cookie dough and forget about it. P.S. Drake, why are you so emotional? P.P.S did I just Kstew Drake? whoops! (inspired by Chris Deliah)
OPTION 2 – The Mr. Wonderful
tell yourself they know nothing, ignore them and never think of it again… at the risk of sounding dramatic, They’re dead to you. (If you got that shark tank reference, you’re my spirit animal)
OPTION 3 – The Transformer
change yourself, become something better and make what they said insignificant, but be careful that you don’t just surprise what you’re feeling, becoming a robot in disguise.
None of the Above >> WILD CARD
Or if none of the above apply, do what I did and play your wild card.
Prove them wrong in the brightest and boldest way you can – in my case, a neon body con dress did quite nicely.  On a side note, this is totally how Blair Waldorf would handle this, or maybe with a headband, a smile and a hint of sabotage but whatever, basically the same thing.

IMG_8517Let’s set the record straight, I have no real issues with my body. I could care less about a thigh gap and have no desire to weigh 100 pounds or be 5’9 (I’m 5’1). Sure there are parts that aren’t my favorite or that I might swap if given the change (Hey Kerry Washington, can I borrow those cheak bones?), like my gymnast-esuqe arms that didn’t come with a gold metal #lame, but for the most part I’m content. And honestly, if I had that much of a problem with my bod, I would work hard to change it… but I would much rather work hard to eat my weight (which last time I check was 130, not 99lbs) in pizza cookie (its a real thing); but I was a little offended when there were comments made about my outfits being a “inappropriate for that body type”, or “unflattering for her figure”.IMG_8756

I’m not gonna lie, after reading a few negative comments I became obsessed for a good 15 min, I got a little defensive, and wanted to respond, but then I decided to absorb it and play my wild card, actually show that I am confident in my own skin and help anyone else overcome a similar situation.

Okay, now I’m gonna get a little fired up – I kind of sort of refuse to believe you have to be stick thin to try certain trends and I will never ever agree that certain looks were just made for models… like ever. That’s kind of the whole point of blogging right? real people, making real trends work for real, non airbrushed bodies so they can share their success (and failures) with other really people… If you wanted to see Karlee Kloss wear something and look AMAZE in it, you could open any dang magazine, but my hope is that if you want to see how someone awkward, average and not-so-cool wear it, you would turn to someone like me 😉
IMG_8575

So here it is, my body: back fat and all. No thigh gap, no rock hard abs and no lack of junk in the trunk (monkey emoji, we need it right here!) It isn’t always the most flattering in every trend I try and sometalthough this post started as way to show as much of my body as I could in the most tasteful way possible to really stick it to those comments that obviously rubbed me the wrong way (lol) it turned into so much more than that. Next time you find yourself in a similar situation, feeling down from something someone said or heart broken from a recent break up,I think it’s okay to dwell a bit (pull a Drake and cry in the shower if you want) but then Blair-on-up and play your wild card. Remember you are seriously awesome… why? because I said so 😉 and anyone who doesn’t see that deserves to be proven wrong by wearing a killer neon dress (that probably could have used a pair of spanx haha oops), doing what they said couldn’t be done or making such a big splash that they won’t have any choice but to nottice. However you do it and whatever you conquer, don’t do it for them, don’t do it for me, just do it for you, because like I said you’re awesome and nothing else really matter 😉IMG_8518

DRESS: 5th & Mercer Dress (available in PINK, white, red, lime (worn here), black & blue)
SHOES: Calvin Klein Leopard Vivian Sandals
BAG: Rebecca Minkoff Mini Mab Tote (also in pink, white and more)
BRACELET: Accessory Jane Gold Bracelet c/o

IMG_8562Thanks to Liv of Corporate Catwalk and my supportive Girl Group of besties, I shared these photos with them before posting and she gave me that extra confidence boost I needed to actually say and share all I needed to share <3  Oh and my awesome Boyfriend Paris for being my awesome, supportive, amazing boyfriend, Paris. 

62 thoughts on “Wild Card

  1. Gabriella

    You look amazing, and this dress is insane on you!! So insane, that I want to buy it (if it wasn’t over my budget!) It’s so important not to get caught up with negativity. Thanks for this inspiring post, beauty!!

    XX Gabriella
    pastelsandpastries.com

  2. Alyssa

    You look so so so fabulous and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise! That dress (and everything else you wear for that matter) was made for you! Hold your head high.

    I’m loving that you paired leopard print with the two bright colors. Love!!

    Alyssa
    Glitter and Grey

  3. Olivia

    Court! Love this outfit. I need this dress in my life. Two shouts for petite girls with curves!!! You look amazing and yes, blogging is all about real people and real body images. Don’t ever let someone make you feel bad about yourself. Women we have enough pressure to be perfect, we certainly shouldn’t have that pressure from each other. Love the pics!

  4. Brittany

    I loved reading this post! You are absolutely beautiful on the inside and out! Thanks for always keeping it real and being such a positive role model for women of all shapes and sizes (I’m 5″2′, sister!! ;-)) to always look and feel their best. Keep up the amazing work!! By the way, you look STUNNING in this dress!! Wowza!!!! :-)

    Brittany,
    http://www.lawyerlookbook.com

  5. Michelle Anthony

    I’ve gotta tell you, it’s killing me to not lead with “uhh, so you’re KILLING IT in that dress” because it’s so obviously true and you should hear it – but I think that’s secondary to the real point. Getting negative feedback stings and it’s easy to want to crawl in a hole and change who you are – but to know your worth and step out boldly as an unchanged version of yourself & to share your experiences on top of that is super brave and awesome. Well done, lady. Keep doin you, and your real tribe will keep following and supporting!

  6. Jasmine

    You look fabulous! I love the way you handled this situation and you are showing women all over that you don’t have to put up with cyber bullying. Very professional and fab way to handle it! Love this outfit and the color is so fab!!

    You rock Courtney!
    xo

  7. Keyaira N. Boone

    After I met you at the Shabby Apple spring preview and you were sooooo gracious and cool I thought I couldn’t love you more. And then came this. Courtney you don’t know how many times I look at your pictures and go “I wish they made that in my size” or “I wish I could pull that off”. Your body is amazing. Some people are dealing with their own insecurities. Some people are jealous of the all the attention you get (and rightfully deserve). And some people are just hateful. NONE of these people affect how rocking you look in that pink dress! Keep posting elegant, fun, and encouraging content. We are here for the real girl lifestyle!!!

    Twitter: @pennedbykeyaira
    IG:@pennedbykeyaira
    Pinterest:@pennedbykeyaira

  8. bianca

    i absolutely loved this entire post.!!! isn’t kim kardashain the same height and probably the same weight as you? oh is it not noticeable because she has big boobs? i don’t get it. you look stunning and i wish i had the guts to pull off this sort of dress.

    i think us as readers become insecure (or at least i do) when we see these bloggers in these awesome getups and they look fabulous..they’re hair is amazing, their makeup is on point, and i never tend to see any belly bulge or cellulite! but then i read things like this and it puts me back on the straight and narrow. i remember reading multiple posts where bloggers said that, that ONE picture you see on instagram was the only one out of 20+ that looked decent enough for them to post. every one is human. we can’t all look alike.

    <333 rock it girl

  9. Lydia Hudgens

    You look amazing girl. Truth – women can be mean and hurtful. I wish we were more supportive towards one another. But this, is great.

  10. Fallon Carmichael | Sage + Sparkle

    Courtney – you look AMAZING! What a wonderful post…. not only because your dress (and body) is killer, but I loved what you wrote. The Wild Card is really working in your favor and I’m sure those “mean girls” are eating their words right about now! 😉

    xxo

  11. Jessica | The Steele Maiden

    It blows my mind that women are still shaming each other like this, when instead we could be cheering each other on. You (and your hot bod) are rad and I feel lucky to have met you through this world of blogging! xx

  12. Laura

    I think you are gorgeous, have a rockin body and you are definitely looking amazing In that dress! I see a confident, beautiful woman and those people have nothing on you! Keep doing your thang!!

  13. C's Collection

    Totally guilty of deleted negative comments left on my blog- it’s just a waste of space in my opinion but the good ones are always welcome… spread love right?! So I’m going to spread some love on your blog here- I LOVE this post, love the hot pink matching set, and YOUR WAIST IS SO TINY! Get it girl- embrace those curves… some days it’s harder than others (I’m right there with ya in the no thigh gap) but know those mean comments are just jealous!

    http://chelseascollection.com

  14. mpocket

    Thank you for being you and showing us all we can do the same! This is amazing and so are you. Your confidance gives me, and many women I’m sure, the courage to love my body and just be happy. We spend so much time worrying and obsessing when we could be enjoying, loving, laughing. Amazing point about bloggers. It was such a light bulb moment for me. That is the point isn’t it! Real people in real situations. It seems like that’s the minority now. You rock girlfriend. Xx

  15. Sam

    As a fellow “curvy” blogger, I totally understand ALL the feelings these negatives comments gave you. What people don’t understand about fashion bloggers is that we are putting ourselves out there for our readers every day, and it’s hard. I know I put a lot of pressure on myself to come up with creative outfits that will look good on camera, and I’ve definitely felt awkward posing for photos all over NYC. Personally, I think that skinny is boring, and it’s not reality for most women out there. You look ah-mazing in that dress, like bow chicka wow wow amazing, and anyone who thinks differently is crazy. I love your colorful, fun outfits and I hope you know that you’re perfect the way you are! /end lovefest

    xx
    Sam

  16. Demilade

    Hello, greetings from Nigeria ☺️ This is my first time reading your blog and I am so impressed, I followed you on Instagram a couple of days ago and your outfits are amazing. Concerning the negative comments, you’re totally right . People forget that the people they say nasty things to on the internet are real human beings with feelings. I’ve never gotten a negative comment before( then again my blog is not popular) but you’ve taught me how to deal with it if it ever happens . Thank you so much, you’re a big inspiration. xx

    coco-bella.blogspot.com

  17. KP

    Oh my gosh, I cannot believe those people were rude to you! You look absolutely great! I love your style, I too am a blogger who loves to wear crazy colours and prints, so I’m behind you 100%. Thank you for writing this post, I’m sure it’ll inspire people.

  18. Eva

    Great post, you’re so right! I also think everyone should be able to try a trend, no matter if it’s flattering or not. This dress looks amazing on you! Great pictures!

  19. jessica

    One of the reasons you are my fave blogger is BECAUSE of your love for food – you just seem so down to earth/relate-able. Add in the love for color and shark tank reference (i binge old shark tank episodes weekly) – and we just might be soul sisters. Stay colorful and stay comfortable! You’re adorable.

  20. Lerato

    Courtney, you are such an inspiration on the daily for me! We’re literally the same height and weight, and I feel like you’re my style spirit animal. So it astounds me (and pisses me off a little) that someone would DARE make a comment about YOUR body. I love your bold style and how it continues to prove that fashion is not exclusive to any body type! Keep doing you girl :)

  21. Mattie

    Oh my gosh, I just did a post similar to this (on body shaming) although, I didn’t rock a hot pink body-con dress like nobody’s business in mine! You seriously look amazing! People who make those nasty comments are seriously disturbed (like whoever said orange was the new pink…thought I’d throw in a movie reference since you seem to be all about it!).

    I also love the combo of the hot pink with the neon bag. Annnd that ‘the Drake’ is crying in the shower and eating cookie dough hahaha. Can I choose that route but without the crying? Love me some cookie dough. :)

    northwestnative.blogspot.com

  22. Joana

    Girl! You are the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen, honestly. Your style is amazing and honestly, you’re my spirit animal. I too binge watch Gossip Girl and could probably cry with Drake songs. I wanted to thank you for this post because I’m sure it has helped many as well as myself. It’s easy to get caught p with what people say about you and honestly I have gotten similar comments (to my face) and I really did let what people said about me. I’ve struggled with weight issues but I’m so glad you’re using your wild card and not let anything get to you, you’ll be an inspiration to many many people out there.

    P.S. I looooooove your blog, I read every post *mouth covering monkey emoji*

  23. Dominika Sygula

    Hiya babe, I can’t stop but to LAUGH pathetic dumb little HATING hoes posting mean comments like that loool they must have nuff time and n job to be spending their time posting negative comments dont ever let any of them bitches get to you they only do it because they jealous of you NOT BECAUSE THERE IS ANYTHING WRONG WITH YOU. U got an amazing body, i’d say perfect. no homo lol. u got sexy thick thighs nice legs bootey breasts everything a woman should have i bet most of these haters are white flat ironing board chicks or something. U looks amazing in this dress. Next time anyone posts something negative just smile at that comment because they jealous of u. x

    thanks for sharing this with us.

    NEW DIY post on my blog.
    http://www.its-dominica.blogspot.co.uk

    Have a lovely week!
    Stay in touch.
    Kisses!

    Dominica S.

  24. Ali

    wow!! you look amaizing in this colorful dress!!!! Love the total look and pics!!!
    kisses…..

    zapatosrojosmoda.blogspot.mx

  25. Shea

    Well I think you look fab! That dress looks like it was made for you, it is gorgeous!!
    This is my first time at your blog, but I LOVED what you had to say about dealing with negative comments and negative thoughts in general. Keep doing your thing!!

  26. Sammie

    Your post came right on time! I was so upset today over an unnecessary comment someone said to me last night and it really hurt, but like you said, it doesn’t matter and who cares what people think! Thank you :)

  27. Laura

    I don’t know what the hell is wrong with some people, but you look FABULOUS in that dress!!! I can’t believe anyone would ever say anything negative about your body or your outfits. You are beautiful!! I love your confidence!

  28. Kelsey

    This post is amazing. Thank you for playing the wild card and being not only beautiful, but BOLD. You are so inspirational, lady! AND beautiful – after reading this post, I know it’s not only on the outside, but on the inside too. :) Keep up the killer fashion – you always look perfect, no matter what they say. :)

    xoxo
    Kelsey

    The Young & Wild Wife
    http://www.youngwildwife.com

  29. Abby

    Hey Courtney! I love you already <3 This post is so real and really rings true. I can't believe someone would criticize you for your body or what you're wearing. I mean, seriously, that body? Anyone would kill to have your gorgeous curves! I've also been a recipient of negative feedback and when I put things into perspective, these are comments made by people who barely even know me. And these are people who cannot even put together an outfit and post it online for the rest of the world to see! Who's got the upper hand now? It's a shame how some people deal with their insecurities by making you feel like you cannot do or wear something. :)

    By the way, I have a new post and giveaway on my blog. I'd love for you to swing by:

    xo,
    Abby of Life in the Fash Lane

  30. rhi

    I personally think you look way better in this dress than the model on shopbop.com
    You look amazing

  31. Julia

    Courtney! I hope you never ever ever ever ever (ever ever ever) change your outlook on life. You radiate warmth an positivity.

    1. Julia

      PS full hips and a booty are the new black. I actually work out in order the have a full figure. I’m naturally thin (which I’m ok with too) but looooove having a fuller body. So does my boyf 😉

  32. Megan Radford

    Thanks for repping those of us who aren’t a size zero! I actually found your blog because I was looking for someone like me who wasn’t thin, but also not plus size.

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